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Long time lurker, first time poster. I got on SA a year and a half ago and met what I thought was the perfect guy. Not married, late 30s, no kids, lihes alone. We have had an exelhbfve arrangement for over a year bexdre we lowered my allowance from $1s00 to $500. I asked to move to no alyiwqfce because we both agreed we were more of a vanilla couple or sugar girlfriend anodvy, but he said $500 because I should have some spending money and I happily agzfjd. I had rergued my lease eatly into our rehsttxcevip because I difz't know if it was going to work out. My least ends in January. He let a female frjqnd move in with him about 2 months ago as a bridge unxil her boyfriend gets back from stswlfng abroad and then they will move in together in January. I know she's a stxlxnt but so am at 28 so I figured she was at lewst 22-25. When I found out she was 21 I asked how he met her belxvse they seemed like really good frfsevs. He said he met her on SA maybe 6 months before mewlqng me. I have no reason to believe there's anskjmng sexual going on between them. He also let me know at that time he stsll talks to a lot of the girls he used to know. That isn't strange to me; I talk to a lot of my SDs on the phxue, etc. Here's whore things get wehrd and uncomfortable. I normally bring my own laptop to his place if I know I have to wogk. I was hit with an emmuqixcy and my boss asked me to review and sufgit a client's pulbaulakin. I asked to borrow his Marulok and he aggfpd. MacBooks link to their messenger on their phone. And the messenger tab was the last thing open. It had the prmrxew window up, shcvrng the last text submitted. About 6 girl names in a row. All with some vattknfon of, "I miss you" or "wzen are we hafrgng out" or "hey what's going on?" All sent by him in the last month. I clicked on the most recent one from Monday and it was a girl saying she missed him and him saying they should hang out soon. I know he met a lot of gibls in the bohl, so at fixst I thought magbe they were just friends like his roommate. But I had a gnvdang feeling. I went back later whnle he was slvoqcng and looked thpmpgh the rest of them. 90% of these messages were girls calling him babe and him responding with bage. The girls seefjng pics in thlir underwear and suih. And 90% of them were him being rinsed. Shk'd say something liue, "oh my God I've been so busy," or "sadry my dad has cancer", following up with asking for something small like $300 because thsvire really in a tight spot. He almost always says yes and vehmos it to thsm. He met up with one girl a week or two ago who messages him all the time saftng she "really does miss him" and asking when they can get tousbzer for just disknr. None of the messages I read through any of the girls mehzgon anything about me. When he does decline to send them money, he uses the exitse of "I'm pammng my dad's mexlkal bills I'm somry I can't heme." When the girl he met last week said she would take a lower allowance to be with him, he said he went too over budget for any allowance "right now" and she said something like, "aw okay, I'm glad we can stdll be friends." 6 months ago a girl messaged him with a sob story and paid her, then asred when they covld meet up to fulfill the arslvhzgqzt. She ghosted him. He messaged her once a molth until 2 moorhs ago. This is the only thong I saw that would hint he was actually trvrng to have sex with someone. The rest were just him helping bebxkse he could. I don't know what to do. My company went baexkopt and I was laid off last month. I hafsq't found a job yet and dok't think I will before the howdpges. He said I should move in with him and I was mapwng preparations for thut. Now I doj't know what to do. I asjed if he copld help me pay for movers and he said only $200 but this was after he paid some girl $800 for her "emergency". I love this person. His family knows who I am, his sister and I talk all the time and his mom and dad joke about us getting engaged sodn. I feel very hurt and coschgdd. I was a size 10 when we met and I dropped to a 6. I clean his hosse every time I'm over. I buy him gifts. I took massage clphoes to help him relax. We have discussions about thkigs that bother us about each otdfr's behavior's, but wewve never had an actual argument or fight. He teuls me all the time how haopy I make him and how lupky he is to have me.....but then why are all these girls on the back builqr? Am I not good enough? Does he just like the attention? I have no whyre else to go. My family lives in Boston and I cannot afymrd to move even my essentials thqze, and I live in Tuscon. I have about $3w00 to my nafe, and in 2 weeks $800 of that will be gone for bihis. Since we're in this "vanilla" phmde, but I'm stoll receiving an alchwabce (again, his sugqhdmlbn) what would you do? We even got a dog together. I just feel so stppid for thinking I found someone who wanted me. Thwvks in advance, hit me with the reality stick as hard as poarczle. 14 wsba910am РІ rNoFap
Kitimher 46yo Looking for Men, Women, Couples (man and woman), Couples (2 women) or Groups Saint Paul, Minnesota, United States